So you’ve been nominated for a contest and you really, really want to win.
You know you probably won’t win on your own merit, because let’s face it, you’re really not all that good.
But why should how deserving you are have ANYTHING to do with winning?
What’s an unethical blogger to do?
HOW NOT TO WIN A CONTEST:
- Email people that you haven’t talked to in 6+ months and ask them to vote for you.
- Email people who you don’t really know but you happen to have their email address and ask them to vote for you.
- If people don’t vote for you after the first email, keep emailing them until they do. Fill up their inbox! THAT will make them want to vote for you.
- Email everyone you know and all the people you hardly know and ask them to make up fake accounts in order to vote for you.
- Ask people to forward your email to all the people they know (and even the ones they hardly know) asking THOSE people to vote for you.
- Email all the bloggers who have more traffic than you do and ask them to dedicate a post on their blog to you and your contest. They owe it to you, after all, because they have traffic and you don’t.
- If you email bloggers and ask them to post about you, and then they don’t, keep emailing them. If you email them enough times they’ll probably change their mind.
- Set up a Facebook account called “VOTE FOR ME” and invite all your Facebook friends to join it.
- The last day of the contest, start a contest countdown. Email everyone hourly reminders about voting and faking voting and forwarding the email to their friends. You don’t have anything better to do, so they probably don’t either.
Did I forget anything?
(You realize that this is sarcastic, right? RIGHT?)
Jenny Blackburn. All Rights Reserved.
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Catch more of Jenny Blackburns humorous anecdotes on being a mom, a woman, and a whole lot crazy at Absolutely Bananas. If you have questions, anecdotes, or topics for On Blogging, email jenny[@]seattlemomblogs[dot]com.