Seattle Mom Blogs

But we all know that these things do not exist. At least not yet. And so we read and we talk. We communicate with other parents and we pay attention to educators. We learn and we share.

Somewhere in between all of that, we are able (hopefully) to fill our parenting tool boxes with the necessary items (tricks, bribes, threats) that will help us parent our children the way we think is best without inflicting too much harm on them or society at large. We cross our fingers a million times and pray that we’re doing the right thing before calling it a day and collapsing on a bed not made entirely of mommy guilt and worry only to awake rested just enough to get up the next day and do it all over again.

Sound familiar?

However, as much as I like to think I’m one step ahead of the game, I’m not. And there is nothing like asking and reminding and reminding again my 10 year old to please not leave his backpack on the bench in the living room for the one millionth time to bring me right back to reality. A parenting reality I’d rather not face because it suggests, rather, SHOUTS, “Hey lady, yer doing’ it wrong!”

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve had this, and similar other, conversation with my child. He is 10 YEARS OLD for goodness sakes! He should understand that we have a routine, we have a system, we have a plan. One which has not changed in the many years he’s been coming home with a backpack. A simple, easy to follow routine which consists of the following:

1. Come home from school.
2. Say “Hi mom, I’m home.”
3. Take off backpack and empty important papers into mom’s hands and/or on her desk.
4. HANG backpack up on one of the 6 hooks in the laundry room placed there specifically for this purpose (ok, who knows why those hooks were placed here, as the previous owner put them up, but they’re there, either way, and that’s what we use them for).

Instead, this is what happens:

1. Come home from school.
2. Throw backpack on bench.
3. Run past mom to see what brother is up to.
4. Hit the pantry, gotta have a snack.
5. Leave it there for days, perhaps with a lunchbox inside which needed to be emptied but who cares? There is a new episode of Sponge Bob that needs to be watched!

Admittedly, my tools are all gone. I have tried and tried and tried and just short of taking away his backpack until he can get the hang of things (no pun intended), which would border on child abuse, I am left empty-handed, not a trick in sight.

So I guess I’ll have to resort to something else. I’ll have to take away Sponge Bob or something he cares about for x amount of days until he breaks the bad habit.

And then, I’ll work with him on the concept of getting the dirty socks into the hamper. His future wife will thank me for that.

Carrie can be found most days at Stop Screaming I’m Driving where she chronicles her life as mother to three active children, wife of one busy fire fighter, constant doer of laundry, and picker upper of Legos. She takes offers of free babysitting and bribes of lattes (vanilla, extra foam) very seriously. Feel free to reach her at carrieb[at]seattlemomblogs[dot]com.

Author’s Note: I originally wrote this post in late December in the middle of the snow storms.

I had intended to write my very first post here at SMB on marathon training in Seattle during the winter. But, then it snowed 7 out of the past 8 days. And the one day with no snow? Seattle cancelled school anyway because it might snow. So, in all honesty, I’ve only run once in the past 8 days.

OK, now that I’ve gotten all of that pesky honesty stuff out of the way, let’s talk running. And marathons. I am your typical Seattle almost 40 yr old mom who got a bug in her ear about running a marathon. I’ve decided that running a marathon near your 40th birthday is like the new rite of passage for women. I trained for and ran the Portland Marathon this past October. I trained by myself and ran it by myself. And survived. And I’m not the person you imagine when you picture a marathon runner. I’m short, fairly squat and definitely not long and lean and built to run.

During the training this summer and early fall, and during the entire race weekend, I told anyone who would listen that this was a one time deal, there would never be another marathon. Yeah. That lasted about as long as it took to drive home to Seattle after the marathon. So, what’s the new plan?

I am looking at the Seattle Rock N Roll Marathon this June. The Rock N Roll Marathon series is making its Seattle debut this year and this may be a good one for me to try. It’s 6 months away and the snow should have melted by then, right?

But wait. Since I first drafted this post, a fellow mom blogger has invited (challenged?) me to run the Tacoma City Marathon on May 3rd. I am seriously considering it. I added it to my “events” on Daily Mile and just may decide to do it. Which means I need to revamp my training plans and move it all up almost 2 months. In this dreary Seattle weather.

So- if I actually hit “publish” on this post, that means I will have publicly committed myself to running at least one or both of these marathons. (I kept the Portland Marathon a secret from most of my real life friends and co-workers until after the race because I somehow thought I would jinx myself by telling people about it. Insane? Yes. Just go with it.) My plan is to save all of my training stories and incidents (and hopefully tips and hints) for SMB and maybe, just maybe, one (some?) of you will decide to run these races with me.

Next post will be about planning a training schedule and a great new tool that recently became available online.

Chris also writes over at www.3giraffes.blogspot.com where she discusses all sorts of stuff that seems to only happen to her.

Three months? Seriously? Has it been three months since my last entry? It’s even a little over three months. That’s just nuts!

I’m surviving, I swear. And it’s not all horrible. Things are much better than they were when I wrote my last entry. The meltdowns have greatly reduced and we continue to feel more and more like a family. All things considered things are pretty good. It’s just such a huge life change. I can’t really stress that enough. Huge, I tell you! HUGE! Taking this particular path to parenthood is not for sissies, I’ll tell you that much.

In a way I feel like I’m the one who’s been hit the hardest by all this change. Maybe I’m underestimating the stress everyone else is feeling, I don’t know. All I know is that I feel overwhelmed most of the time. I feel like I’ve been inundated with a million new tasks and there’s an increased busyness to my life. There’s more laundry, the house is a cluttered mess, and I actually have to cook now (and lord knows cooking is not my strong suit). There’s homework and sports and afterschool activities and doctors appointments and the PTSA. But it’s not just that. There’s something more. Something bigger. There’s a huge amount of pressure hanging over my head.

I’m the mom now.

I never could have understood it until now, but there’s something about motherhood that carries with it an enormous burden. It seems in most two-parent families one parent takes on the role of the central person in the family. And in most families that person is usually the mom. She’s the nurturer, the caregiver, the organizer – the one the rest of the family trusts to make sure everything is taken care of. Each person has a unique and important role in the family, of course, but it seems in most families the mom is the glue that holds it all together.

Now that person is me, and I feel painfully inadequate. I pretty much have no idea what I’m doing. Now I know what you’re thinking: all new moms feel that way, right? Well I’m sure they do but most new moms don’t have kids who have already been parented by multiple other parents, both good parents and – well let’s just say – not-so-good parents. Most new moms don’t start out with kids who have thoughts and opinions about the job they’re doing. It’s hard for me to fake it with these kiddos.

You know those “super moms”? The ones who volunteer for every committee? The ones who prepare gourmet meals? The ones with the perfectly kept homes? Well I am far from a super mom. I’m more like a barely-keeping-up mom. At our house on an average day you’ll find dust on the TV, dog hair collecting in every corner, and clutter everywhere. The other night dinner consisted of ramen noodles mixed with peas, corn, and sliced up kielbasa (I told them it was called “Super Ramen”). And don’t even talk to me about the PTSA. I just don’t have the energy for it. Admittedly, I am completely winging this mom thing and parenting by the seat of my pants.

This may be my first crack at motherhood, but it bears and uncanny resemblance to one particular time when I started a new job. Shortly after quitting my job at Microsoft to go work at the Humane Society I can remember asking myself what the hell I was thinking and, in a moment of panic, I wondered if it was too late to go back to my old job.

Truthfully there have been times since the kids moved in that I have wondered if there was a way I could go back to my old life. I feel guilty about that, but at the same time I have an inkling I’m not the only new mom who has ever felt that way. Especially a new foster-adoptive mom. But just like my job at the Humane Society I feel confident if I hang in there long enough it will eventually become my most rewarding job yet.

This entry also posted with the .

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In addition to being a writer and adoptive mom, Susan Metters also carries the distinguished title of Cancer Survivor Extraordinaire. Some of her secret ambitions include meeting Dr. Phil, hosting Saturday Night Live, and rising to the top as a rock star. You can read more about Susan’s life adventures by visiting her blog with the Seattle P.I., Lemon Margaritas. If you have ideas, questions, rants, or ramblings feel free to email susan [at] seattlemomblogs [dot] com.

We’re all preparing for a great 2009. We’re hopeful, inspired, making plans. We’re organizing. We’re creating budgets. We’re saying good-bye to one year and ushering in another. Which is why it’s the perfect day to say thank you to the gals who established this community as they step forward to new opportunities.

Kathryn, Jenny, and Eve, the founders of Seattle Mom Blogs, have passed the torch to Mamaspod. We’re excited to come together and bring both podcasted reviews of places you suggest, interviews of local bloggers and reviewing recommendations from resources like Red-Tricycle, and Parent Map. You’ll see these updates occuring over the next few weeks as we launch our exciting new section. Everything else remains the same with the same fantastic columnist writing the quality posts you’ve come to love and enjoy.

But before we start the new year, we want to make a promise to you: Our resolution is simple, one word actually, and it’s “Connect.” We’re honored to be trusted with this community to continue the momentum Eve, Kathryn, and Jenny started. We couldn’t fill their shoes but we’re honored to walk in their wake.

So thank you, Jenny, Kathryn, and Eve, for getting such an amazing group of women together. For thinking of community in our local area. For wanting to bring moms together in person as well as online. It’s been freaking lovely to meet each of you and I know this isn’t a good-bye, just a new venture for you all. We’re glad to keep alive your vision and hope you’ll stay close.

Do you have a story you can share? Do you have a memory from SMB that you want to post? Let us hear it. Tell thank you to these ladies who brought us together. I know I personally gained not just a new venue to share thoughts but friends I consider real. So thank you, ladies. Very. Much.

The next gathering will be sometime in February. We’re starting an anual wine-tasting event. Watch for that announcement. We may need plastic wine cups, though. As it’s been told, ONE OF US breaks things. (And thank you for that memory, too, ladies. It’s one of my favorite SMB stories: That night at the Method Party that I totally SPAZZED and broke a glass. Rad. I love you for loving me anyway.)

Much love and bringing in the happiest of New Years!