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Almost three years ago, my husband and I decided, what the heck, we’d leave our family and friends behind and travel 12,000 miles away to a foreign country which we’d heard so much about and watched everyday on TV.
We imagined eating everyday at a diner with checkered floors and Formica tables where a waitress who knew us by name would pour us coffees and ask us if we’d have our usuals. We dreamt of sightseeing every weekend for two years, visiting little tucked-away towns where old men sat on rocking chairs and outside barber shops, watching us warily while they smoked pipes and/or played cards. We imagined living in a nice big house with a white picket fence and neighbors coming over to play and a dog we’d name Clunkers (like Phoebe’s friend’s dog in Friends).
Come January it will be three years. We’ve eaten at a diner, let me see, three times because we discovered that diner food was not exactly very healthy. In fact, we rarely even eat out and the kids are so used to the Malaysian dishes I cook daily that they don’t even like diner food.
We still do try to travel regularly but tend to make for the outdoors more than just visiting small towns, although I still love them (I live in one!). Old people don’t really sit out on their front porches because it’s cold or wet or it isn’t the 50s anymore or maybe they’re more mobile these days and prefer to be up and about.
We live in a town house and therefore have no space for a dog. We hardly know our neighbors because, well, nobody ever came over to welcome us to the neighborhood. I guess my condo is just not that sort of a community.
You may say that much of what we thought of America, all those whimsical, romantic notions planted by American media and movies, have been dashed. It wasn’t exactly a rude awakening. It was more like a gentle, sneaky sort of unveiling. Like the diner thing. The novelty wears off when you discover how expensive it is to eat out, or when you discover Trader Joe’s and realize you can make better pancakes or hash browns and eat them in your jammies at home.
However, there were a lot of pleasant surprises for us, things we never knew about America. More accurately, things we were skeptical about and may have had problems believing could happen. For instance, even when we knew that Seattle – and perhaps much of Washington – was considered a liberal place and welcoming to foreigners of a different culture, we expected to be discriminated against all the same. Who can blame us, coming from a country where discrimination and oppression happened on a daily basis, you pretty much just learn to accept it and live with it.
Not only have we’ve been made to feel welcome, at times, it feels as though we’ve always been one of you. We’re not discriminated against (there have been occasions but they were more rude than serious), but we’re not given any special treatment either. Everyone gets the same opportunities if they work hard. Everyone pays taxes. So far, the only thing that’s been different for us from Americans has been the fact that we can’t vote.
Which brings me to the point of my whole entry: The presidential election has been such an educational, inspiring experience for me and my family, to be here to see for myself how true democracy works, how when you place your faith in a system of laws and the constitution, that when your voice matters, real change can happen. To a Malaysian, this is nothing short of a miracle.
My own country, Malaysia, is facing challenges of its own today and I cannot help but wish and hope that it too can find the change it so desperately needs. Although we claim to have a democratic system, it is a broken one and sadly, its people are powerless to fix it. However, in our last general election, we managed to salvage part of it. For us, the road to change will remain a long and difficult one.
So even though beneath your shiny veneer, all the whimsy, glamor, celebrity and fantasy, you may be flawed, you America, are still a great nation. Living here, being a part of this historic event, has made me a little less skeptical and a lot more hopeful that with time and determination, with people and belief, all things are possible. My children, unlike my husband and I, will grow up knowing that this is the way it should be. That there is always hope and with hope, a little less skepticism and a little more faith.
For that, I thank you.
See what I mean when I say YOU have inspired the world (yes, the first guy is the guy we want to be the Prime Minister of Malaysia
).
Read more of Jennifer Tais writing at The I’mPerfect Mom or enjoy her photos at www.jennifertai.net. If you have questions, anecdotes, or topics for Tea Leaf Journals, email jenn[at]theimperfectmom[dot]com.
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